Dining With The Moon
by sparkiE1
Summary: ...staring....Angst!Remus! A werewolf's thoughts before he is transformed completely into a ruthless, powerful Child of the Moon. Some tame gore and suicidal themes. All Lupin fans come together!!!


*Disclaimer* All characters belong to J.K. Rowling. Simply put; they seem so real.....  
  
*Author's Note* AngstRidden!Remus! Whoo hoo!!!! Sorry, couldn't resist. Ever notice that a lot of Lupin fics have the word 'Moon' in the title? This one is no different. Yeah.... Anyhoo....errrrr..... reveiw and stuff..... have a nice life... don't sleep under a full moon... I'm gonna shut up now ^_^;;  
  
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Outside, on the streets of Hogsmeade, I could see everything. My golden eyes missed nothing.... my tufted ears passed no sound unnoticed... People were moving in pairs, singles, groups. Thick, gray snow clung to the streets.  
  
It was a beautiful night, to say the least. A pale, silvery moon hung low tonight, full and ageless. All the other Children of the Moon raced with the clouds tonight, not caring if the blood of humans touched their fangs, their claws. My mind and soul was bound in Wolf's Bane, tight and thin, twisting my heart. I wished to be with the others, to belong to a pack. But no, one of the young cubs must've been different, they said. He has compassion for the humans, so he shall stay trapped. I grew out my talons and ripped down a chunk out of an armchair.  
  
The shreds drifted down. I snapped at them with a tearing, growing muzzle. The bits of dark maroon stayed pinned under my claws, but I wanted to dig them out with my canines and spit them out, pretending to be the flesh of the victim I so much wanted. A killer, bloodthirsty and vain, was building inside of my bones, knocking the humanistic love from my mind. In a moment, all I would be was a beautiful, huge creature of the Moon, ready and waiting to kill.  
  
What would they know about this pain? Sometimes, all I can think of are ways to die alone and to free my beast. Silver. Fire. Anything to sever my spine. What would James and the others think? If I told them what I sometimes longed to do? Would they pity me? Think I was insane, that I was joking?  
  
But there is worse. A young teenager should never have to go through this. I feel that it is only the ones who deserve it that do.... Do I deserve this? Maybe. The blood of the innocent stains my paws, my fangs, and my amber gray pelt. That is why I deserved it. But did Peter deserve what happened to his family? Did Sirius deserve what happened to his little sister? No. None of them did.  
  
My muzzle grew completely, and my teeth ripped in an old, worn and empty bookcase, leaving the long, jagged marks.  
  
I deserved this. They didn't.  
  
Again.  
  
*Rip*  
  
Again, again, again and again and again!  
  
Tearing and slashing and tearing and slashing and brutal ripping through the old furniture of the shack! I could smell the blood! I could smell it!  
  
I turned. My reflection was staring back at me through a thousand shards of shattered mirror glass. I was no wolf. My muzzle, long and powerful and ruthless, was longer than any wolf's. My legs, lithe and beautiful and strong, ending in long toes, ending in talon-like claws, digging into the tattered rug with an oriental design that was wearing out. My eyes were golden. My ears huge. Pure power.   
  
Human knowledge was singing in my veins all of a sudden.   
  
Wait.... I remembered it. Suicide. But there was another way. If they heard... they would surely hate me. There it was.  
  
I could always join Voldemort. It would be so easy. That would take my mind off things... I could always kill when I pleased, and everyone would fear me... maybe even respect me.  
  
I was about to turn away, when I saw a figure standing outside the shack in the mirror. I turned to face the window, the only one that was not boarded up.  
  
Sirius, Peter and Celestina were standing there. Celestina was flirting with Sirius, whose cheeks were glowing pink in the winter night. Peter was hiding back giggles. I roared in pain and threw my head against the wall. A shudder ran through the walls like it was afraid.  
  
No. I wouldn't go to the Dark Side. I wouldn't-just for them.  
  
A mouse, a rodent of some type, skidded across the floor.  
  
Prey!  
  
I pounced!  
  
The rat's miserable face peered up at me through sad, dull black eyes. I cracked down on its skull.  
  
I looked up through the window, and my eyes darted down the street to a small restaurant. Lily and James were sitting on the porch, laughing and talking. Tonight they dined with the moon.  
  
I pulled back the flesh of the rat, and swallowed.   
  
And so shall I.  



End file.
